Black Friday shopping for the perfect Hawks gifts

Spending my imaginary bucks wisely.

The Hawks have had a topsy-turvy beginning of the season. There’s been some huge upset wins and some confounding losses all smashed together like a turducken. But as the calendar turns from November to December and the stuffing turns to stocking stuffers, it’s time to begin shopping.

The day after Thanksgiving is, of course, Black Friday. And in order to take advantage of the sales prices, we go shopping today for a handful of the members of the Atlanta Hawks.

Trae Young — a foot spa

Young is quietly putting together not only one of the best passing and facilitation seasons in recent memory, but also one of the best in league history.

Currently, he’s averaging 21.8 points and 12.5 assists per game, which are marks that has only been matched or bested once in NBA history — Magic Johnson in 1988-99.

But a nagging Achilles injury has slowed him down at times per his own comments. And partially as a result, Young is only shooting 44% from inside the three-point arc. Young is absolutely vital to the team’s success, so why not gift him something that can soothe and massage a trouble area of his body?

Dyson Daniels — a Tasmanian Devil doll

Daniels has taken the league by storm, especially defensively, in just his first season as a starter. He creates havoc with his activity and long arms, and he currently holds a strong lead in steals and deflections so far in the young NBA season.

The Great Barrier Thief’s manifestation of a whirling chaotic animal from his home country? Well of course, a Looney Tunes Tasmanian Devil doll. I think gifting him a real Tasmanian devil would violate a bevy of international laws, so I’ll refrain from doing that.

Zaccharie Risacher — a goldfish tank

Risacher, the no. 1 overall pick in this past draft, has more than gotten his feet wet in the NBA. As of Thanksgiving, Risacher is fifth in the league in minutes for a 2024 rookie, and his contributions have not gone unnoticed.

He’s been a willing rebounder, cutter, and has shown a lot of defensive versatility despite his youth and inexperience. Coach Snyder often praises his hard work, something that may become a pathway to success going forward.

But there’s no way around it — his shooting numbers are a bit rough right now. He’s hitting just 39% of shots from the floor and 27% of shots from three. So, a gift of a goldfish tank will be a good reminder to have short-term memory when it comes to his shooting. And so he should keep putting shots up regardless of whether they connect or not.

Jalen Johnson — a poster of Goku from Dragon Ball Z going super saiyan

Don’t look now, but Jalen Johnson has leveled up once again. After breaking out last season to the tune of 16.0 points, 8.7 rebounds and 3.6 assists per game, Johnson has taken over an even larger share of the Hawks offense in just his fourth NBA season.

He’s now averaging 20.1 points, 10.3 rebounds and 5.2 assists and is putting the league on notice for All-Star selection consideration. For this reason, I’ve decided to put in my online cart and check out a poster of Goku from everyone’s favorite childhood anime as a representation of Johnson gaining new basketball powers.

Clint Capela and Onyeka Okongwu — a matching pair of pajamas

Clint Capela has started every one of Atlanta’s 19 games so far. But at 22.5 minutes per game, he is registering the fewest minutes per contest since his 2015-16 season — his second in the league.

A big reason for this is he’s often being spelled at the end of games by Onyeka Okongwu. Okongwu has closed (in my definition, played the final three minutes or more) in eight of the 19 games this season.

‘O’ offers a big more versality on both ends of the floor, even if his performances have been inconsistent. But both guys just want what’s best for the team ultimately, so they receive a matching pair of pajama sets adorned with Harry the Hawk images.

Kobe Bufkin — IcyHot and a shoulder wrap

Bufkin suffered a right shoulder dislocation at a practice this summer, and then he re-injured the same shoulder in a similar manner in the preseason. He has since returned to action and had a nice performance Wednesday against the Cavaliers with nine points off the bench and a solid shift defensively against an always dangerous Cleveland backcourt.

Naturally, he deserves some supplies to aid in his ramping up and recovery from the setbacks to his non-shooting shoulder.

Larry Nance Jr. — darts and a dartboard

Nance has been a certifiable sharpshooter in limited minutes as the Hawks’ nominal third center. Among players with at least 20 three-point attempts this season, Nance is first in the NBA in three-point shooting percentage at 64%.

Unfortunately, Nance often finds himself out of the gameday rotation when everyone is healthy. In the meantime, he needs a way to practice his pinpoint accuracy. I hope the veteran has a game room or man cave in his residence to challenge friends and foes alike to games of darts.