The Southeastern Conference once again let its football freak flag fly, and we’re here to unpack it, wash and dry it, and fold it again into a nice neat package. It’s the SEC in a Sentence.
Alabama: Does Kalen DeBoer own stock in a goal post manufacturer?
Arkansas: No one in the SEC has found more novel ways to both win and lose football games than the Razorbacks, who gave up 18 unanswered points to fall 34-10 to LSU.
Auburn: Auburn is two losses away from Tiger boosters actually caring who Hugh Freeze has been calling from his university-issued cell phone.
Florida: It’s difficult to tell who was more angry, the Kentucky fans who lost their winning streak against Florida or the Florida fans who may now have to keep Billy Napier.
Georgia: If you’d told me on August 1st that Georgia would be 6-1 at this point and that I’d be more worried about facing Vandy in the SEC Championship game than playing Tennessee and Ole Miss in the regular season I’d have taken both that scenario and whatever hallucinogen got us here.
Kentucky: Mark Stoops really needs to slow it down because Kentucky fans aren’t going to turn their attention fully to basketball for at least another couple of weeks.
LSU: “The Bayou Bengals will travel to College Station this weekend for a matchup of the only two teams who remain undefeated in SEC play”, he wrote as he knocked back his third absinthe.
Mississippi State: The Bulldogs are 1-6 in year one under Jeff Lebby but honestly should feel good about the direction of their program.
Missouri: The Tigers are just a tiny bit better than Auburn, which is something I guess.
Oklahoma: The Sooners didn’t fire offensive coordinator Seth Littrell on Sunday because his unit only managed nine points against Southern Carolina, but it probably didn’t help.
Ole Miss: Arguably the best team Ole Miss has had this century needs a win over reeling Oklahoma to avoid a playoff-disqualifying third loss.
South Carolina: Wrecked the Sooner Schooner in Norman and now head to a bye week
Tennessee: Josh Heupel’s offense no longer scares anyone, but his defense probably should.
Texas: Sure the Longhorns came up short against Georgia in their biggest home game in a decade, but at least Steve Sarkisian also fostered a minor quarterback controversy in the process!
Texas A&M: They warned us about Texas fans and frankly we should have listened.
Vanderbilt: Vanderbilt and Texas will face off this weekend in a battle of teams tied at 2-1 in the SEC.
Until later…
Go ‘Dawgs!!!